Truck

4 Poems by Catfish McDaris

Where’s My Pussy

Jimmy loved his cat, but was

highly allergic, when he got

home from school one day

Fluffy was missing

“Mom, where’s my kitty?”

“She got old, so we put her

in the nursing home with

your Grandma & Grandpa

Grandma farted like a Harley,

Gramps wore diapers & kept

his ugly choppers in a glass

Jimmy didn’t see Fluffy again,

he had a hunch he’d been

bullshitted, he thought it probably

won’t be the last time.

River Of Knives

I am the butcher knife that peels your potatoes

I am the butcher knife that carves your steak

I am the butcher knife you sharpen on your electric can opener

I am the butcher knife that opens pork & beans on a camping trip

I am the butcher knife under your pillow

I am the butcher knife that cut out your baby

I am the butcher knife that circumcised your penis

I am the butcher knife that cut off Geronimo’s hair

I am the butcher knife that sliced off Van Gogh’s ear

I am the butcher knife that opened Bukowski’s liver

I am the butcher knife that cut off the tails of the three blind mice

I am the butcher knife that cut your umbilical cord

I am the butcher knife that trimmed Hitler’s mustache

I am the butcher knife that slices off cancerous breasts & testicles

I am the butcher knife that plunged into Jeffrey Dahmer’s heart

I am the butcher knife that O. J. says he didn’t use

I am the butcher knife that cut the scar in Al Capone’s face

I am the butcher knife forever at your throat

I am the butcher knife always waiting for you

I am a river of blood & I am you.

Ernesto

Mind crumbling

Suicide looming

One more thought

One more drink

One more bull

One more fish

One more woman

Booze betrayed

Castrated by

Literary leeches

Best days gone

Melted, evaporated

Sucked dry

Nothing left

No way out

Shotgun in mouth

Finger white on trigger

Tears, blood, bone

Brains on ceiling

Dripping down walls

Splattered like words.

Cherry Lipstick & Chanel #5

She was 40 & I was 16

She slipped her long lacquered fingers inside my zipper

I was in heaven & I almost creamed my jeans

She pulled it out & wiped it up & down each powdered cheek

Talking baby talk to it as it grew long & hard

I damn near lost it in pleasure

Lowering her cherry lips over the head she blew & sucked

Nibbling & tonguing the piss hole

My nose started running & asshole twitching

She played my skin flute like a virtuoso

I held back as long as I could

When my ears popped I gushed my load

Into her greedy mouth my bung hole throbbed & farted

I was sure I had shit all over her Cadillac front seat

She wiped her lips & sprayed breath freshener in her mouth

Lowered the mirrored visor & fixed her hair & lipstick & spritzed her perfume

Smiling she gave me a tongue kiss

I said, “Thank you, Auntie” I got the lawnmower

Started & finished her front yard.

Catfish McDaris has been active in the small press world for 20 years. He lived in a cave at a nudist colony and in a Chevy in Denver an entire winter. His biggest seller is Prying: with Jack Micheline & Charles Bukowski. His newest chapbook will be Eating Raw Jackrabbit & Snorting Black Cocaine.